Phew! Good thing he didn't end up killing them, then his boss would have had to make him bring in donuts on Monday as punishment...
"Uh... My attorney law man says I can't talks to no one about me crashing my super awesome police car into that stupid two wheeled car thingy. He says I'm royally screwed, up ****** river, and I majorly **** the bed, whatever that means. I have a shiny badge." -Ohio Trooper Jacob Daymon
Soon after the interview, the motorcyclist was probably brought up on charges for damaging the police cruiser and obstructing a peace officer. I'm sure they're probably looking at a minimum of 10-12 years in maximum security. Serves them right for actually going the speed limit, while in the slow lane, and wearing helmets, with functioning lights, while riding one of those loud annoying Harleys so no one could tell they were around. It was obviously so loud the poor police officer had no choice but to completely abandon the controls of his police cruiser in order to shield his ears and curl up in the fetal position since those Harleys are so scary. That dirty biker was clearly the cause of this accident. Everyone knows all of those bikers are hoodlums anyways... They probably just came from getting loaded at one of those seedy biker bars after raping and pillaging a peaceful law abiding community. Geesh! Some people! Don't they know motorcycles are dangerous? Why weren't they both wearing one of those gorgeous and comfortable neon orange and green reflective vests with built in wildly flashing multicolored strobe lights in addition to the helmets they likely weren't required by Ohio state law to wear? Good thing there was a first responder on the scene to ask them such important questions like, "You alright?" and not administer any first aid. I'm glad he took it so nicely slow and easy getting out of his car, he was going to need to conserve his energy so he could diligently scurry over to make sure to put out the motorcyclist's now flaming dismembered appendage on the side of the road. Those bikers could have burned down that entire forest! Thankfully, he didn't attempt to flag down any passing motorists to assist him. Safety first, you never know who you're going to meet on the roads these days. Good thing he put out those traffic cones before taking the time to make sure his poor police cruiser was ok, some other innocent automobile driver could have hit the back of his cruiser and then he would have been in a real pickle! We need more fine young men like him serving the public!
Seriously though, if I survive a crash like that then get up and kill the cop who hit me, is it self defense? I say hell yeah it is! ******* tried to run me and my wife over! I've got proof! He didn't even try to brake! Then he mocked us, "You alright?" If I were him I would have politely yelled so the police officer could hear me over my wife's blood curdling screams of pain, if I could even tell if she were alive or not in the event she was unconscious since the adrenaline makes using your own hands and ears useless because your heart is pounding so **** hard, "OF COURSE WE'RE NOT ALRIGHT! LOOK AT ALL THE ******' BLOOD! HER FACE IS ******* MISSING YOU RETARD! Then he offers no immediate critical first aid and proceeded to make sure his police car wasn't too badly damaged, doesn't attempt to immediately stay with the downed riders to keep them conscious... I wonder what time he actually put in the call for EMTs... I'm just saying, it's not right and people have been legally summarily killed for a lot less... What a d-bag.